Berlin on my mind, Paris in my heart

I just finished uploading 125 photos to the Berlin folder on Flickr. It's only Day 2 of the stay there of 6 so please be patient. Most of it is my walk from the wonderful apartment on Kanzowstraße to the Hertie School of Governance, my flatmates, the school, and a bit leading into our first real night there (girls on bikes). The hostess for our flat was actually at the "big kids" Global Public Policy Network conference in Singapore (along with 2 of our Sciences Po students) where they focused mainly on learning new pedagogic techniques and standards for accreditation. Our "little kids" student conference was the one in Berlin, the 2nd of its kind as London School of Economics hosted the first one this past March.

So, while the hostess was gone, we got to crash at her place. So very kind of her to offer it up. I ended up seeing a few interiors of flats while in Berlin. There's definitely a cookie-cutter aspect to some. Two of the ones I saw were identical - I mean identical - on the inside and about 10 blocks apart from each other. Shanaz was my flatmate and bedmate - suprising to the both of us. She's from the Lee Kuan Yew School of Public Policy in Singapore and this was her first sight of autumn - I could only imagine the shock to her body and senses. In the guest room stayed Lu, also from the same school but originally from China so the seasonal change wasn't so foreign. Man, let me tell you the amazing discussions we had and how utterly patient they were with me. I mean, I was there for the conference primarily but also to socialize. And there was only one key for the whole flat. So imagine. I still think, embarrassingly, back on the lunch I had with colleagues in the US when my dad treated us and explained the biological effect of living in Buenos Aires on my constitution: I'm perpetually late to things and definitely a night owl. The truth can turn cheeks red!

The three of us ended up leaving the flat together every morning for 4 days, grabbing breakfast (coffee and a strudel treat for me, water and sandwiches for them) at the corner bakery (semi-chain sort of bakery/shop), waiting a bit for the tram (aka street car), and taking the 25 minute ride to Alexanderplatz and then walking to Schloßplatz in Mitte (map here for you map-philes). Yu and I had some very interesting discussions about the one-child policy of China and my family planning organizing background.

Once there, every day was nicely packed with speakers, panels, coffee breaks (proven to be the best starter for networking and ultimately power-brokering with the next Secretariats of the World), lunch in their totally Aramark-catered fantastic lunch room (the building is shared with ESMT - it's no wonder).

After a while I started to seriously consider applying to the dual-degree program and doing my 2nd year there. The academic program seemed spot-on, the facilities were futuristic compared to Sciences Po, the people seemed intelligent and warm, the weather familiar, the shopping so so so cheap, the food various and vegetarian, the beer wonderfully tall, the men more easy on the eyes, the night life more cutting edge, the English flowing in any situation, the horizon and time for Berlin very cutting edge and about to explode. All of these wonderful aspects and I looked at Sciences Po and Paris in my mind's eye and felt like I was attending an orphanage while visiting a palace. I felt a little like I should be defending my school and trying to remember why I loved it. But frankly, I've only been living here for 2 months and 1 day and attending actual classes for a month and half. I don't feel school spirit yet and at the price I'm paying (no help with the depreciation of the dollar, thank you) I feel like I need some serious vitamin shot of love!

But then I started seeing a bit of the reality. Sure, I was in a palace, but a palace with rigid, boxy structures and timeliness that hurt my soul. The cleanliness was too much (expect that I'd like to argue that the Germans let their dogs poo more on the sidewalks than the French do, thank you). The aim of the academics seemed wonderful (it was one of the programs I applied to but I had made my decision on Paris before I heard confirmation or rejection), but not quite as roomy as my program.

I realized I missed the stink of Paris. The chaos. The strikes (more coming this week). The overwhelming density of the city. I feel empowered here to fight for mine - a feeling I'm not so used to having been raised Scandinavian, Lutheran, and passive-aggressive Minnesotan to a degree. It's almost as if the lyrics "if I can make it there, I'll make it anywhere" apply more to Paris than NYC. The city of lights. The city of love. The city of distrust. The city of old ladies peering through the slats of their shutters down at the street, down at you. The city of two-hour walks to work. The city of perfected wine, perfect nose snubs, perfectly earthy cheese, perfectly unique skies. Things in disarray appeal to me and while I love the disjointed, free struggle of Berlin I'm much more in love with the wild, half-drunk off a bottle of wine, riotous and rambling, slurring and sexy, frightful and fenced off Paris.

Man, this is gonna totally hurt me financially. And I might very well change my mind in a month when the application procedure opens to dual-degree programs. But for now I'm not ready to give up on this city or the program or myself. I know in time I'll feel stronger and more proud.

Anyway. Go check out how Berlin is changing and meet some of my wonderful colleagues and new friends.

[PS. Oh, and I somehow ended up as the co-chair of the 2008 GPPN Student Conference in Paris. Don't ask, please. No really. Please.]


highlights:

on the train, during the Berlin strike










autumn out the apartment window









flatmates in Berlin








Henry addresses the conference, Hertie











Television Tower in stereo